Silent

stand by and watched as you walked pass me. you saw me and stared straight into my eyes and smiled. eased my day like being given strength while feeling heat raising up. words exchanged together without giving any hints. from the start, shyness had comfortably made my feelings as its home.

years we spent our time together and for years i had kept what i truly felt inside of me. admired i said, but is it true or is just a word to prevent myself from moving foward? Why am I afraid of? Who or what keeps me from moving foward? questions asked and yet i never manage to answer them.is it denial or just admiration or fear being left to the side with a broken heart?

what am I to do to end this endless torture? what you see before your eyes are just a image made by me. my true self shall be kept inside of my heart, none able to see.

never will you see my feelings and knowing they are meaningfull. If only I dare to stand for myself and made them clear. hate the world of categorization, burning up my will to strengthen me.