Inevitable Truth

times and times again i see what i abhorred and yet i do nothing to avoid them. vomitted blood just to get away from them and somehow they will make me feel better, continuing to torment my feelings.

out of this, all i wish is to have it my way. pictures taken signifying ones dream. painting drawn reflecting one's wish. movies made begging to relive their life according to their thoughts.

no one gets what they wanted. the wicked previal getting the rich and fame. all i get is dust. passing time fulfilling my plea. never once in my life will i get what i want. a mediocre life lead by a unknown person. asked for him, no one answers. cried for him, only uncertainty remains.

for a second, i fantasized mytime on earth, living the way i wanted. my mind is where i find peace but sadly the thoughts itself could never be real. my mind is my sanctuary, a place i wish to live in for eternity.

another wish i desire. my needs will never be fulfilled, my cravings will never end. new ones will emerge and by that time, my time will be darkened. depressed by everything. nothing will lead me to happiness but my desires.

unreasonable doubt

lost, i proclaimed. taken from myself and be someone else. so i waited, longed for something like no other. ended up missing all that was meant to be mine. cried, will they come back? shed tears of joy when my hopes are up. brought myself to my knees when all else has faded. so i waited again, for something that's not.

see this, means nothing. what am i to do? i asked. petrified when a news spreaded across my domain. where else will it go? so i stayed, seeing something passes by. a chance or a hope, i pondered. waited amd waited, nothing came.

at last, i left. by the time i reached a certain point where i lost track of where i am, there it goes again. passed me by. on my knees again i cried. never will i ever could understand this passes. return to where i came? questioned myself. or should i keep going until i find what had passed me. there i waited, not moving. time moved so did my age.

at last, i died. unable to see anything. so there i cried for one last time.